Motivation

Published October 22, 2010 by S

Everyone has a dream.  Most of us have many dreams, but don’t always know how to turn them into realities.

What are my dreams?

-to have a happy and healthy family

-to get a real education, or official job training.

-to be financially secure, and be able to give my kids every opportunity I can.

-to change my lifestyle habits to lose weight and become healthier for me and to set an example for my kids.

-to be a good friend to anyone that needs one.

-to continue to find way to positively contribute to the world.

But in order to do anything in our lives, we all need some sort of motivation. For each person and each goal that motivation is different. For some people it might be material gains.  Money, trips to exotic places, or just “stuff” that they can buy. 

And for others their motivation might be what they can then give to others. I’m not saying this is 100% my motivation but I would like to hope that what I do won’t just benefit me, but will also benefit my family.

When I have a major decision to make, I find myself thinking more and more of how it will affect my family, and less about myself.  I know that if I didn’t have my family to think of, that I would probably be less afraid to make some of the harder decisions in my life.  Which jobs to have, or if I should go to school, what programs to study, or even what to eat for dinner.  But because everything that I do will affect them, I put some serious consideration into some of those choices that I might not do if I was on my own.

So what is my motivation?  Well, i’d have to say about 75% of the time my motivation is my family, and what will be best for all of us….but that other 25% is all about me. 

I want to lose weight and be healthier. To do this I want to lose 30 lbs, and actually fit into a size 12 again. I want to like the way I look in a bathing suit…but that’s all superficial and only for myself.  My kids don’t care what I look like, or what clothes I wear, and Mike seems to like me the way I am…extra padding and all.

I want to finally get a post-secondary education. This is for me to know that I have accomplished something.  That I’ll have a “qualification” and the chance of a higher earning potential.  Money isn’t everything in this world, but it sure does help! I make a decent amount above minimum wage, but I’m not happy with it.  I know I can do better…for me and my family. 

I want to be a friend and help those in need. There are so many ways that a person can give back to the world.  Over the years i have tried so many things.  I have tried to organize fundraising activities.  I’ve given money whenever I could afford to charities…..

But the way that I have found most satisfying for myself has been through Gestational Surrogacy, and here again my family is my motivation. Having my 2 children is one of the most amazing things in my life.  So many mothers say that they can’t imagine their lives without them, and it’s true!

Once you have the amazing joy of being a parent, you really can never imagine what life would be like without your kids in your life. Your dreams change, and instead of  just planning for yourself, you start seeing the things you do and altering them to accomodate your kids.  Vacations change, your choice in vehicles, and even the content of any TV or movies that you watch….but I wouldn’t change it for the world!

but I digress….the point of that last paragraph is that being a parent is such an amazing thing, and I can’t imagine that there are people out there that are denied the chance to ever have that.  Either through genetics or pure medical mystery….the Intended Parents in the surrogacy community can’t have what comes so easy to many of us…a Family.

By some fluke of nature I seem to have a body that can help these people. I look terrible in a bikini, but dear lord do I have a highly funtioning uterus! (to bad I can’t put that on a resume though!  Ha ha!)

I believe that everyone needs to find at least one way to give back to the world.  My way is by helping carry babies and to create families. I have come across many people that don’t understand how I can do this, physically, mentally, and especially emotionally.

I can’t explain “how” I can do this, but I have known for years that I could. The baby that I have carried as a surrogate and any future ones I hope to carry, are not genetically mine.  My eggs are not used and since it is not my child my connection to it is like the connection I feel with the children of my friends.  You care for them, but you just don’t feel the same as with your own children.

I also have to admit that being a surrogate is partly an ego thing.  Forgive the horrible grammar, but by doing this I feel really good about me! I’m helping someone else to have a child! Bringing life into the world!

For me it’s just the right thing to do.  Of course it’s not always easy, but the good far outweighs the bad.

I want to give my kids every possible advantage. I had so many advantages growing up, but the things that I remember most always involve my family. We were never rich by any means, and the only vacations we ever took together when I was little were usually a week during the summer spent away at a cottage.

These weeks to me were wonderful. For that week we lived next to a lake, had a small boat, and were able to hike in the woods, visit the Hershey factory, and see cows walking down the country roads every day.  Not as exciting as Disneyworld but pretty awesome for me.  It was also a week where my very hard working parents could relax and we could all be together as a family.

I want my kids to know that feeling of happiness and adventure as much as they can.  I want to give them all those experiences and also some more exotic ones that just weren’t possible when I was younger. I want them to know that they can do or be anything they want.

So if you’ve made it this far in my rambling you see how much my family influences me.   For me they are the right motivation.

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