You Gotta Do, What You Gotta Do

Published April 7, 2011 by S

well, the last few months have been a whirl wind in craziness for my family.  So many changes and more to come.

Changes with my mom, changes with my job, changes, changes, changes!

Newest change?  Mike got a promotion!

Same company but a step up.  Better hours, more money, responibility, and a step closer to where and what he wants to be in the company. But there is a catch.  The job is in London, Ontario.

So we are moving to the 519’s.  He has to start his job in the next few weeks, so what will be happening is that he will start the job, and stay with his parents in nearby Ingersoll.  Of course he will come home on his days off, but who knows when those will be.

My plan in all of this is to spend the next few weeks getting the house into showing condition.  We have settled on a budget for this, and as of today, I’m trying to get things going.  I have placed ads on Kijiji to sell some items on my Mom’s behalf (as I was asked to do) that have been living in our garage for the last month.  I placed another ad looking for help ripping out the broken pool, it’s enclosure, and our nasty deck, but then got a call from Mikes’ Aunt Wendy who has someone that can do this for me, and I’d really rather the money go to someone I know than to a stranger.

We have to replace a few closet doors, repaint the living/dining area, get new flooring for the living/dining area, of course get the pool and yard dealt with.  I also think we need to scrape and repaint the garage door since it looks pretty ratty, and we need to deal with the upstairs bathroom, and in general clean up and declutter. We also have a TON of kids stuff to sort out and get rid of since we have so much accumulated that the kids have now grown out of.  So it will be a busy few weeks for me, but I’m lucky to have many offers of help.

As you can imagine my In-laws are quite excited.  I’ve had offers of help to work in the house, emails of house listings and lots of encouragement.  They moved up there for work reasons in 2008 and I know my mother in law has had a hard time with it.  She is very family oriented and it was a minimum 1 hour of driving to get to her closest family and then 2 hours for the rest of us.  Brian and Sue have always been so involved with our kids.

Haylee cried when we told her this news yesterday.  She is a bit scared about the idea.  She will miss her friends, but she is so sociable that I’m sure she will make friends quickly in our new neighbourhood.  I plan to talk to her Sensei to see if he can recommend any dojos or Karate centres in whichever area we choose to settle in. She is so amazing and I’m sure she will adapt quicker than I will.

I don’t think this will cause any problems with my surrogacy plans.  Timing sucks because with all the delays in the surrogacy, I may be in the early weeks of pregnancy when the move finally happens.  But on the upside the travelling time won’t be much different from our new area to Toronto, than from Thorold to Toronto.  The downside will be that I’ll finally have to break down and find new doctors for everything. I really like our family doctor so that will be an adjustment.

So for now it’s just a waiting game to see how things develope, and get things done without driving myself nuts in the process.  I plan to find a babysitter for at least one evening a week just so I can go out for a bit on my own. Even if I just go to a movie on Tuesday cheap night. . . it very well might save my sanity through all of this.

Either way, things will be good in the end, but until Mike actually leaves to start working, I don’t think it will really hit me that this is my new reality. Right now it won’t effect my day to day life, but that will change when I’m here on my own with the kids.

I’m going to miss living in Niagara. I have lived in this area my whole life.  What little family I have left is all here, and most of my friends are still here. I’m usually pretty open minded, but that is when I know I have my safe zone to come back to.  Now I’ll have to create a new safe zone, and i’ve never had to do that before.  I’ve always lived here, but if this can happen now, maybe we’ll be back in a few years.  Anything can happen.

So for now, I have to do whats best for my family, and that means that I just have to suck up my insecurities, put on my brave face, and get on with things.  At least i know that i’ll have 3 months to get ready and say my goodbyes to the area. That’s something. =)

I’m also lucky that through being a surrogate I have been connected to a few online communities and developed a different set of friends.  Oddly enough many of them live in my soon to be new home, so I know that I’ll have people to help me get used to the area, and hopefully some new strong friendships will be formed.

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